Are Gift-Giving Parents Out of Control?
Or
All I Want for Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth and a Ferrari
If giving is better than receiving, when is giving inappropriate? This is the giving season˳ Shall we rain all manner of gifts upon our children, or is this time of year a teaching moment that will last throughout this season and beyond˳ Gifts, gifts, and more gifts result in more, more, and more clutter and, worse, lessons lost on the recipients˳ No, you cannot have a Ferrari˳ You have to wait until you are 16˳
Unfortunately for the recipients, gifts may flow throughout the year as prizes or rewards that are not deserved˳ You givers know who you are˳ Taking out the garbage, making your bed, brushing your teeth, getting good grades, being nice to your sister, or setting the table are NOT occasions that deserve gifts˳ Enough already! There are special events each year that warrant gift giving, but moderation is the watchword even if you can afford the Ferrari˳
Just because your ninth-grader wants a $400 Gucci belt doesn’t mean he gets it˳ The latest iPhone? Forget it, pal˳ And I can’t believe what my grandson wanted for Christmas˳ Actually, I never heard of it, but it’s the rage at his high school in Connecticut, and kids are paying big bucks for it˳
It’s a shirt called, Supreme˳ Kids will pay several hundred dollars for the privilege to wear a shirt that doesn’t even have Mickey Mantle’s name on the back˳ And according to my grandson, prices can go as high as a thousand dollars˳ OMG˳
Even if you can afford elaborate gifts, don’t do it˳ If begging persists, my standard answers would be the following:
• Use the money you have saved˳
• Wait until you have saved enough˳
• Maybe when you graduate from college˳
• Yeah, right˳ Not this year˳
• Ask your grandmother˳
• You need more Legos? You have enough to open your own Legoland˳ How about some Lincoln Logs?
Lessons learned
Here’s a lesson on giving˳ Depending on their age, buy your children a few gifts each that are earmarked for a child or a family in need˳ Then, with your children accompanying you, deliver the gifts to the family or the organization that will distribute them˳ No, you cannot sit on my lap while I drive˳
For example, Toys for Tots, sponsored by the United States Marine Corps, will welcome your contributions, as will the local homeless center˳ If your children are old enough to have their own money, allow them the freedom to purchase gifts and decide on the needy recipients˳ Remember, they are not the needy˳ If they are, ignore this paragraph˳
Many houses of worship have ministries that reach out to the local community to serve the less fortunate˳ Giving is not limited to tangible gifts but also includes giving the gift of your time to local organizations that serve the community˳ Time is the same as money˳
Get rid of clutter and feel good about it
Do you have a garage or attic full of “stuff” that you or your kids are not using? Don’t wait until that gift-giving time of year to get rid of it˳ As a family, gather it up, pack the car, and drive to the appropriate donation centers˳ Now, doesn’t that feel good? And the neighbors will stop talking about you˳
A recent article in the New York Post caught my eye˳ “Present Tense” by Naomi Schaefer Riley references the bestselling author Marie Kondo, who wrote The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing˳ Ms˳ Kondo emphasizes a “minimalist” lifestyle˳ That sounds like a good idea, but my emphasis is less about clutter and more about establishing a culture in each home that practices the three K’s: Karing, Kompassion, and Kindness˳ Mark it down but spell it correctly˳
Ancient times
During my childhood in ancient times, I didn’t expect much, my parents couldn’t afford much, and I didn’t receive much when it came to gift-giving season or, for that matter, throughout the year˳ All I ever wanted to survive in my neighborhood were four things that would make me the happiest kid on the block: a bike, a baseball glove, a baseball, and a pink Spalding˳ We used that pink rubber ball to play stoop ball and stickball˳
As a parent and grandparent, I followed suit and never lavished expensive gifts on my children and grandchildren˳ I usually gave books, money, and good advice about the importance of reading and making your own choices˳
Yeah, but it’s 2017
This “me first” generation salivates for the latest electronic goodies, motorized toys, designer clothes, and, God help us, video games˳ Don’t give in: give out instead to those in your community who need food, clothes, books, a bike, and maybe a baseball glove˳
Source by https://ezinearticles˳com/?Are-Gift-Giving-Parents-Out-of-Control?-I-Want-a-Ferrari&id=9845683
