Separation is a painful event for both members of a married couple˳ It can be initiated by one while the other will have to bear the brunt of the decision˳ The other member will also want to “get even” with the spouse who suggested separation˳ Whether or not one is the initiator or the recipient of the tragic decision, both feel victimized˳ Imagine a couple in Nevada’s hot city˳ Things are not really working out for them and they consult a Las Vegas Divorce Attorney˳ The Las Vegas Divorce Lawyer succeeds in arranging their separation˳
Interviewing the initiator, which in this case would be the woman (and usually it is), would reveal initial feelings of guilt at the thought of separating from her spouse˳ At this fragile stage, she would be hovering between thoughts of compromising or walking through the door˳ The thought of consulting a lawyer brings the initiator guilt at first˳ But then, as the months go by, the conviction becomes more firm˳ When the recipient of the decision, which would be the other spouse, learns of the sad idea he begins to sense feelings of low self esteem, rejection, denial and revenge˳ He also attempts to salvage the relationship at this stage˳
Specific phases have been identified in which feelings involved in separation are clearly described˳ The first phase is disenchantment of one member of the couple˳ Usually this person eventually recommends separation˳ In this phase, there are feelings of dissatisfaction and concealed resentments˳ Breaches of trust occur and arguments become more frequent˳ The person begins weighing pros and cons of separation and also starts working on a strategy for carrying out the separation process˳ The important difference between the first phase and the following phase is that the dissatisfaction in the existing relationship is not expressed˳ This phase exists for a period of approximately two years before the verbal confession˳
In the second phase, the discontentment in the relationship is verbally expressed˳ Ironically, a “honeymoon phase” can occur, in which the unsatisfied spouse makes a final attempt to salvage the relationship˳ But soon enough, the feelings break through and the spouse speaks up˳ What follows is a feeling of relief that what was inside is “finally out”˳ The initiator would also feel intense feelings of guilt, anguish, doubt and much grief˳ This phase occurs about 8-12 months before the onset of the legal processes˳
The decision to separate constitutes the third phase and occurs approximately 6-12 months before legal proceedings˳ This phase is rarely reversible because the idea has been given a lot of thought˳ Emotional distance is created by the initiator˳ It is in this phase that the likelihood of extramarital affairs increases˳ Impatience with the other spouse grows and anxiety for the future of the family begins to pile up˳ The initiator also feels needy˳ At the same time the eventual recipient of the dreadful proposal begins to enter phase 1˳ Eventually, the couple proceeds with the legal events and separation becomes official in the end˳
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